The day we are born, we begin to age. Certain milestones mark the years: Baptism or Bris, Commencement, Bar or Bat Mitzvot, reaching the legal age to drive and drink, high school and college graduation and that first real job. Marriage and children are neon lights marking the road of aging.
Somewhere around the age of 60, the speed limit sign on the road to aging says slow down. About five years ago, a cardiologist gave me that advice. That I probably wasn’t doing myself all that much good by continuing the exercise routines of my 30’s, 40’s and 50’s. By (grudgingly at first) following that advice I am able to enjoy the exercise I continue to do, without guilt or feeling inadequate.
Although currently not the most popular moral code, the Ten Commandments provide a very concise and complete GPS for our lives. One of those commandments, number 5, obligates honoring our elders, especially our parents.
An important perspective on the fifth commandment is that it applies to ourselves…we need to honor and respect our aging selves, wherever we find ourselves in this process.
The physical changes to our aging bodies do not mean we need to become sedentary and passive or give up on life. Now is the time to make emotional and spiritual changes in our lives, a time to undertake different activities and interests.
This is not necessarily easy. There is a difficult emotional adjustment that takes place when we stop working 70 hour weeks and jetting around the globe to close the next deal. Handling this change requires a reevaluation of our self image and those things that give meaning to our lives. We stop judging ourselves by the hours we bill, the number of patients we see or the dollars we’ve saved. Or even the hours in the gym or miles we run or cycle.
Now is the time to take on those hobbies and interests that we had neither the time nor patience to pursue earlier, like walking (instead of running), yoga, reading, writing, photography, public speaking, pilates, taking or teaching a class, playing bridge—or even writing a blog. And one of the hardest for me: simply doing nothing. When am I finished? These things are now not only possible, but extremely stimulating and fulfilling.
Who’s to say that we cannot still create new things, make a difference in the lives of our children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. We can impact new friends and even strangers. We can be just as vigorous, as in our earlier, more physically active years, but in a different way. Never forget that the years we have lived have provided us with experience, knowledge and judgment that the younger generations still lack. Sharing with others what we’ve earned, but more importantly what we KNOW, is perhaps the most joyous part of the aging process. And this also is one of the most significant goals of life: to be a light to the generations, to the world.
So, the next time friends and family gather, focus on and be mindful of the words of the traditional Hebrew toast: “L’Chaim!”. To life. To Life. Enjoy and make the most of your new life.